Having to hold back.

07:35 Karen 14 Comments



I will tell you a little secret, my girl is bright - not just bright but A level, A* potential bright, but that's not the little secret - I will get on to that later.



She has had offers from all but one of the unis she has applied for. Her boyfriend, of the past two years, is also bright (on some subjects brighter than her on others not). She wants to study Biomedical Science, he wants to study Zoology, they have chosen to apply to unis where both these subjects are taught so that they can go together.

Now here is my secret, at the moment they favor Newcastle



which is almost 300 miles away and over 5 hours to drive there. I cry at the prospect, I cannot even type this post without tears running down my face. She is my only child, my baby and I would much rather she went to Essex uni - 20 minutes drive away but a a push could cope with their next option which is Sheffield


which is 3.5 hours drive away but NEWCASTLE!

So whenever they talk excitedly about it I have to smile and join in and realise that is is the time to let her go, find her wings and fly. Believe me fly she will because wherever she goes and whatever she does she will give her all and do her best.

Perhaps it is time to stop holding back and let a wider world benefit from the marvel that is our girl Grace!

Reasons to be cheerful:

1. That I am putting a brave face on it.

2. That my friend Julie knows how I feel and can relate to it as she felt the same.

3. That the kids have the brains and determination to carve their own paths in the world.

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14 comments:

Denise said...

I'm crying with you - it's such a mixed feeling isn'it it?You are so proud of them and so happy that they are happy.It will be lovely that they can go together wherever they go.Like you say,whatever she does she will fly.Hope they choose Essex x x x

Amy said...

Oh it is so hard ... my Mum had four of us go to uni four hours away from her - I think it was really tough. You will manage with the choice they make, thank goodness you will be able to use skype!

Cheri said...

My oldest attends college 3 hours away and we deal. Except this semester - she is half a world away on your side of the pond! Skype really is a marvelous thing.

Sian said...

I'm starting to think about this one too - two years until my boy leaves and he'll probably have to study pretty far from home. He already has a trip lined up for the summer - he will be representing his school and his country at a language Olympiad in Pittsburgh. Which is great - but it's a long way to go with people you've never met before.

Hi Karen ~ Oh, my dear, I know exactly how you feel. When Carrie chose Northern Arizona University it was heart wrenching for me. NAU is 2.5 hours from our home and it seemed like a whole world away. When we took her and her things and dropped them off, I cried like a baby all the way home. It did get easier, with time, but it was a big adjustment for both of us.

I'm sure you will feel the same about Gracia too though, your pride in her will overcome the distance and time will go by quickly. I'll certainly be thinking of you as you both make this transition! All the best to you, my friend! ♥

Alison said...

It IS a difficult time for parents....we WANT our children to be independent and to find their way in life, but we just don't want them to be quite so far away, At least wherever your daughter goes, she will have her boyfriend there for support...that was my main worry when I took DD to Barcelona(not as bad as it sounds-I actually LIVE in Spain, though a five hr drive away!). Of course, I was more worried than she was and she has a great group of friends up there.

Jo said...

Karen I can't imagine how you feel but I will next year when it's my baby's turn. You've made it so obvious how your daughter will soar wherever she is but I know how much you want her close to you. Great LO

WendyB said...

Oh I do know how you feel. My son is 24 now and I can still remember the day we left him for the first time. I have two daughters to go the same way yet (2 & 4 years time) so I guess letting go of the first one was probably easier than letting go of the only one. Anthony was only 1.5 hours away so we became quite used to the trip and it became a city that we know quite well now too. You'll have to start planning yourself some lovely trips up north - some gorgeous places to visit :-) It will all be ok x

debs14 said...

Oh Karen, that is a very long way isn't it? But it's only 45 mins on Easyjet from Stansted ;-) I've spent many a teary eyed journey driving home from Sheffield and I know that every one of us 'uni mums' will be nodding our heads and knowing that horrible empty feeling you have inside when your face and voice is saying 'yes that sounds really exciting' and your heart is saying 'Don't go.....'

Lynn said...

Just wanted to send some hugs mine are still little but letting go is hard. You sound like a lovely mum who will be very supportive.

Sandra said...

Thinking of you. I think though she gets her positive "I can do it" energy from you.

Lisa said...

Oh, how my heart aches for you! So bittersweet joy... so proud of you for recognizing and putting on the brave face. You are amazing!

humel said...

Oh, sweetie - I do feel for you. I hope she can find the right place for her, and that the right place for her is near you.... Good for her doing so well, and good for you seeing so much to be positive about as always xx

Jinnag said...

Oh my dear - I do so feel for you - my youngest is not even just a drive away - I have to get a boat or a plane to see her - it really is hard on us mums - specially when we have brought them up to fly! Huge (((hugs)))